The first four months of my new life

Wow, I can hardly believe that it has been so long since the last time I blogged! I had the best of intentions after the dawning of the new year last year but, I guess, life happened and it just didn't turn out the way I expected. I'm sure most of everyone has just about given up on me ever blogging again but I felt the urge today so...here you go!



It is kind of funny to look back on that last post that I wrote at the beginning of 2007 and look at where I am now, here at the beginning of 2008. I thought, at that time, that it would be a big year for me but I had absolutely no way of knowing just how BIG it would be. Actually, I don't think that "big" even really scratches the surface of what 2007 was. Most of the people that read this blog at one time would know that I gave birth to my first child on October 19, 2007 and really, if that isn't big then I'm not sure what is!



Childbirth..hmm..now THAT was an interesting life experience! It wasn't that I didn't want to have a baby because I definitely did. There hasn't really been a time in my life that I didn't think that I would have children and my husband and I had made a decision to start trying at the beginning of 2007 so really, I shouldn't have been THAT shocked to find out at the end of January that I was pregnant. But I was..I was flabbergasted. But I have to say that I really, really enjoyed most of the entire experience of being pregnant and can honestly say that it is something that you can never really understand or appreciate fully until you have experienced it. The experience of childbirth is very much the same way..until you have been through it, you have no idea not only what it takes to get through it, but also just how much it gives back to you. It is almost like being given the membership card to a very exclusive club. I guess that would have to be the "I've pushed a very large object out of a very small hole" club or something like that...hehehe. But really, after I had my son I started to look at other mothers in a different light, knowing that most had been through a similar experience to mine and to this day, I can't help but wonder if they feel the same overwhelming and fierce pride and need to protect that I feel for my son.



But actually, to be honest, I had started looking at mothers in a different light long before the day I gave birth..it really started the day that I found out that I was pregnant. I had had a negative test result already so by the time I retook the test and it came back positive, you could have knocked me over with a feather. And my husband and I had planned on taking a shopping trip to Buffalo on the day we found out and I can honestly say that I spent the entire day wandering around and looking at mothers with their children, wondering just how in the world I was EVER going to be able to do it. And I can say that it only got worse as I got closer to my due date, almost to the point that I wanted to ask women on the street how they managed to keep it together. But now, with my four month old son sleeping in his swing beside me as I type, I realize that you just do it. You learn on your feet. You do your best and know that is all you can do. I think the best piece of advice that I was given was from my friend Kate during one of my many frantic phone calls when she told me not to worry so much because all my baby wanted me to do was to love him and didn't know any better that I didn't know what I was doing. It really has been an incredible experience and even though there have been (and still are) days when I have to ask myself what the hell I was thinking, I just have to look at my son and see him laugh and smile at me to know that it has been worth every sleepless night.



So, in light of that, here are a few things that I have learned about motherhood, and just life in general, over the past few months.

• Despite what you may think, when your friends tell you that it gets better, they are telling the truth

• You can survive on 40 minutes of sleep in a 48 hour period

• Just when you sit down for a few minutes of relaxation, that is when your baby will wake up screaming

• When people offer you help, don't be too proud to accept it

• Get an epidural

• A baby swing may just be the best thing ever invented

• Your life will never be the same as it once was but it will be better in many ways

• Your baby will eventually start sleeping for longer periods at night but it still won't feel long enough
  
• There will be times when the crying just gets to be too much and when you need to just have a few minutes of time to yourself when you think to yourself that you miss the way your life used to be. This is perfectly normal..it happens to everyone and it does NOT make you a bad mom.
  
• The big milestones of the first few months (first smile, rolling over for the first time, etc..) will always happen way before you are ready for it. It is okay to be happy and sad at the same time that your baby is growing so quickly
  
• The smallest things can be endlessly entertaining to a baby and will be a lifesaver to you and your sanity!
  
• There is absolutely nothing quite like the sound of your baby laughing or the sight of your baby smiling at you

Well, that is all that I have for now although I'm sure I'll come up with more along the way! I hope that I'll be able to be around here more often and give you a bird's eye view as Wil gets older. I've missed you guys!